How To Be Yourself (It’s Simple)

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Why are we so afraid of being authentic? Is it because we fear judgment from others? Is it because we don’t think we’re good enough?

You need to stop caring what others think of you. First impressions are made out to be overly important, when, in reality, you should never have to try so hard to impress someone. Being 100% yourself is impressing as it is. In such a harsh society, a person who is unabashedly herself should be viewed as a role model for everyone else out there.

You need to stop overthinking before speaking. Be mindful of what you say, but don’t rack through too many negative side effect of sharing your thoughts. You shouldn’t hold back from stating your unique opinions because you deserve a voice in this world. If you went your whole life without speaking up because you were too worried, you would be left with many regrets and your brain would reach its full capacity of trapped thoughts. You wouldn’t want to be trapped in a small room all alone, so why would you allow your thoughts to be locked away without coming out for air?

You need to stop questioning why you are so weird, and instead, embrace your quirks. It might be hard to believe, but everyone out there has at least one wacky quality that stands out from the norms of society. If you realized how crucial this quality is to yourself and to life in general, then you would go run outside and let your freak flag fly without any second thoughts. If there is someone who doesn’t appreciate your weirdness, that just means that they are having a difficult time appreciating their own differences.

You need to stop being so self-conscious about your physical appearance. Contrary to popular belief, beauty and attractiveness don’t come with a specific set of guidelines. Fashion doesn’t have its boundaries; you should express who you are through your own personal fashion choices. Hair and makeup are forms of personal art that are created for your own interpretations. You shouldn’t be worried about how others will perceive you through your appearance, but instead, you should own how you look. Put yourself together based on your own expectations and walk out that door knowing exactly who YOU are.

It doesn’t make sense that being authentic has become a crime in society, but sometimes you just have to push society’s “rules” aside and make your own. This is the story of your life, and you don’t want to write in any false information or embellishments. It’s a straight-forward nonfiction story about you, and it deserves to be a bestseller.

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Looking Perfect Is Unattainable

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As I squeezed into my skinny jeans, I started to wonder if Taylor Swift ever has to squeeze into her jeans. Not only did I conclude that she pretty much never wears jeans, but I also realized that even if she is able to put on jeans with ease, why should it matter to me? Other people’s jean struggles or lack of struggles, along with other’s “perfect” or “imperfect” bodies, shouldn’t matter to me or to you.

The message being spread to women is that everyone comes in different shapes and sizes. While this message is positive and encouraging, it doesn’t always counteract the messages that society and media are really sending us. The majority of famous women are shown in a “flattering” light, meaning, Photoshop works its sickening magic to virtually delete all visible flaws. This also means that all women who view these images are given an unrealistic idea of what you have to look like in order to be thought of as attractive. In reality, not one single person looks like the women on magazine covers. Striving to be as skinny and flawless as them is a waste of time because you will ultimately be left with disappointment.

Instead of wanting to look like someone else, why not embrace the way you naturally are? As long as you’re healthy, there’s nothing wrong with being a size that society calls “ugly”. Society doesn’t know anything when it comes to true beauty. Skinny shaming and fat shaming are the worst, because it makes it seem like there’s not a size that anyone is ok with. Instead of worrying about what others think of your size, or worrying about another person’s size, you should find ways to be happy with the way you are.

Your size can never define you as a person. Your physical body doesn’t reflect your personality, so if anyone is shallow enough to dislike you because of how you look, then they don’t deserve to get to know who you are. Your waistline doesn’t tell anyone how generous you are, the size of your pants doesn’t reveal how smart you are, and the overall shape of your body doesn’t determine your capabilities in life. You shouldn’t be down on yourself just because you don’t look stereotypically “perfect”.

The next time you look in the mirror because you’re not satisfied with the way your body looks, stop for a moment and just smile at yourself. Think about all your incredible traits and all the things that make you a unique person. If you’re able to see your smile in the mirror and feel good about it, that means you’re already on your way to accepting yourself. You have to remember that size is just a minor aspect of yourself, and that it should never take over. Size doesn’t matter, you matter.

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Why It’s Okay To “Play The Field”

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A girl who dates around a lot is typically called a whore, while a guy who does this is called a player. We stereotype these people as serial daters, making them sound like killers, which is a bit extreme. If you don’t truly hurt anyone in the process of “playing the field” should it actually be considered taboo?

If you’re not committed to anyone, you’re completely free to date whoever you would like to date. Whether you don’t want to be tied down, or you just want to explore your options, dating around is a great way to find out what type of person is right for you. It allows you to get to know a variety of people in the world, and maybe you will be able find your match during this process.

In this generation, relationships are formed faster than the snap of a rubber band. Typically, a couple becomes “official” after only a couple weeks of dating. We have become a fast paced society, so this seems normal to us, but is it actually healthy? When we jump into a relationship, we are faced with difficulties because we learn more about the other person that we didn’t have time to learn beforehand. It makes me wonder what dating was like years ago, when a boy would ask a girl to go steady, only after giving himself the proper amount of time to know if she was the one. I’m sure relationships still had their flaws back then, but maybe they were still stronger.

Going on various dates can help you see what’s out there, rather than shutting yourself out because of one person who seems perfect at the time. Sure, you’ll eventually have to choose someone out of all these people that you meet, but that doesn’t mean you should choose the first person you lay your eyes on. Even if you just go on a few different dates, you can let yourself see the differences in people, and you can learn more about yourself too. You can learn about what you’re actually looking for and see what specific things you like about people.

I think “playing the field” has such a bad reputation surrounding it because of the way society has defined it. Society thinks that it means sleeping around, or even being unfaithful, but it doesn’t have to have those meanings at all, as long as you are doing it in a classy manner. You don’t have to commit yourself to someone right off the bat just because you think they have potential. Look around, and you could possibly find someone else with even more potential.

Think of it as a metaphorical representation of a soccer field. If you’re on offense, you’re not just standing in one spot the whole time, because that wouldn’t do anything for you. You’re running up and down the field trying to accomplish a goal. Ahem, “playing the field”. If you’re just sticking to one person before attempting to meet other people, you might not reach your goal.

There are many exceptions to this, so this is why I’m not forcefully telling you that you should play the field or else you’re going to fail in life. I’m just saying that it’s perfectly normal and perfectly okay to explore your options, especially if you’re unsure about being with someone. If you meet someone and you truly know from the bottom of your heart that he/she is the one, then okay, go for it! But don’t look at the people who play the field and automatically pull a red flag on them. They just choose to spend more time searching for that special person.

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Why You’re Missing Out On Real Life If Your Phone Is Your BFF

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I’m a communications major, and in one of my classes, we’ve been talking a lot about how technology is destroying our society. While this information is incredibly depressing, it’s also the truth, and many people are ignorant of it.

A major issue in society is the constant use of smart phones. We are always taking pictures for Instagram or Snapchat, we’re always updating our Facebook statuses, we’re always texting….you get the point; we are attached to our cell phones. And while you may be using your phone to talk to your friends, in reality, it’s like your phone is your friend, not the people you’re texting with.

Think about how much time your eyes spend being glued to your phone. I will fully admit that I am one of the humans of this generation who has an attachment to my iPhone, and I can tell you that sometimes I get distracted because I feel the need to check my messages all the time. This is bad!! It takes you away from reality and essentially into a virtual world.

When you’re out with a friend, and you’re texting a different friend, it’s almost like you’re not really there. Make a pact with your friends to keep your cell phones put away when hanging out, and I bet you’ll feel a whole lot different; you’ll actually be able to give each other your full attention…whoa, what a concept!

If you’re out to dinner with your family and you Instagram your plate of food, or even worse, a selfie with your plate of food, then I just “literally can’t even”. Who gives a crap what your dinner looks like? Who is that going to benefit? Do you feel good posting pretty pictures of your meals? Unless you’re a professional photographer, then gtfo please. Put the phone away and enjoy your food with your family.

Okay, let’s talk more about selfies for a second. Again, I will admit to being a part of this, so I’m not trying to be a hypocrite. But I definitely make sure I don’t overdo the selfies. Some people take selfies EVERYWHERE. Like just stop now please. Again, if you’re with people, and you’re getting distracted by your phone because you want to take the perfect selfie and have to retake it 15 times, then you need to re-prioritize. Instead of focusing on perfecting your selfie, put your phone away and enjoy whatever activity you are doing.

My phone actually sometimes drives me crazy. Sometimes when I’m texting several people at once, I get annoyed and don’t feel like answering anymore, but a part of me feels like I have to or else I come off as a rude person. This is what society has come to. Imagine a time without all this technology…I bet people actually communicated in person 24/7! (So weird, right?!)

Communication is important in our world. It’s a necessary thing in order to connect to one another. Real life connections are crucial because they allow for a more positive environment. Think about the different ways people communicate through text. We think it’s easier to say certain things through text, and while this may be true for certain circumstances, it’s also very false. Take a breakup, for example. Now, do you really think it’s okay to break up with someone through text message? From personal experience, I can say that, no, it’s not okay. This is because text messages don’t allow us to see facial expressions or hear a tone of voice, so we misconstrue things. We might think the person is speaking in an angry tone of voice but, in reality, they could just be trying to send you texts in a calm manner.

Long story short: face to face communication is the best and we have to make sure that we don’t lose that. So try to limit the time you spend on your phone, especially when you are around other people. Let’s turn this society around!

P.S. I just realized that this was totally a blog post of me ranting but that’s okay, I hope you enjoyed it!

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The Difference Between “Pretty” And “Beautiful”

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Our society has certain “standards” for what makes someone beautiful. But society really doesn’t know the true meaning of the word “beautiful”. According to one of the definitions from dictionary.com, beautiful means “excellent of its kind”. People are beautiful not because of their appearance, but because they are unique and live life their own way.

There is a huge difference between “beautiful” and “pretty”. In fact, dictionary.com defines pretty as “pleasing or attractive to the eyes”. A flower can be pretty because of its bright colors, but a person can be beautiful because of his or her heart, mind, and/or soul. Physical attraction vs mental/emotional attractive is the dividing line between pretty and beautiful. When you first see someone, you might think they’re pretty, but it’s not until you get to truly know them, that you can deem them to be beautiful This is what society lacks knowledge of, and it all stems from the mass media.

Back in the day, stars like Marilyn Monroe were considered beautiful for having curvy bodies. Today, society deems slender bodies to be the most beautiful. Photoshop is used on every single person whose photo is taken for a magazine, in order to make them look “perfect”, aka “beautiful”. In reality, anyone can be beautiful despite the way their body looks. There are so many body types out there which makes us all different from one another. If we all had thin torsos and thigh gaps we would all look the same, and it would be boring.

I define a person’s beauty not by their smile, but by the things that make them smile. I define a person’s beauty by the way they think and they way they feel. That is the only true way to distinguish beauty. It doesn’t matter what society says, you are beautiful because you are you, not because of your outer layers. So if you don’t think you’re beautiful, look deep down into your soul and you’ll see that you are.

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