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Why You Shouldn’t Hate Your Ex’s Significant Other

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After a breakup, it can be tough moving on, and it’s even more tough trying to deal with the idea of your ex being with someone else. Once your ex starts dating someone else, your immediate reactions are:

1. “What?! How did he/she move on so soon?!”

2. “Omg their new gf/bf is so ugly!”

3. “HAHAHA he/she totally downgraded from me!”

4. “Lol, she/he has to put up with him/her now, sucks to be them.”

You see a trend here? Putting down your ex’s new flame might make you feel better in the moment, but in reality, you probably shouldn’t be doing that. In most cases, the new flame didn’t do anything to personally hurt you. Heck, chances are they might not even know you. Even though you aren’t saying these things to their face, the idea of it all is still morally repulsive. Putting someone else down just to boost your own self esteem will only result in self destruction.

Your ex is the one who chose to date someone else, so ultimately, you were hurt by them, and not by their significant other. I’m not saying you should hate your ex (because you shouldn’t hate anyone really), but I’m saying that it’s not worth it to sit there picking out the physical flaws of the new person they’re dating because it’s a waste of time. You should instead be finding ways to move on and better yourself.

It’s always tempting to creep on your ex’s Facebook (if they haven’t blocked you) or creep on his/her gf/bf, but you could be using that time more productively. You’ll just keep feeling resentment and sadness if you keep looking on their pages, so what is the actual point of looking? Do you really want to keep reminding yourself of the situation? NO! So here are some steps you can take:

1. Block your ex and his/her significant other from EVERY social media site. If they haven’t already blocked you, block them from everything ASAP so you won’t be tempted to look at anything they’re doing. Also block their number while you’re at it, because why not.

2. Stop thinking about your ex. This is easier said than done, but it is possible. You just have to immerse yourself in activities that you enjoy, such as spending time with friends, in order to keep your mind busy.

3. Understand that you will also find someone new someday, on your own time. You’ll find someone new when you’re ready, and when the time is right. Don’t worry so much about competing with your ex by trying to upgrade to a better person. Take it slow, and wait until you find someone who treats you right and who you are content with.

4. Learn how to be happy on your own before dating again. You should never live life counting on someone else to complete your happiness. Only YOU can make YOU happy, and you need to remember that.

Also just remember this: people move on, because that’s the way life is, and that should be taken as a lesson instead of a hardship.

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Why You’re Missing Out On Real Life If Your Phone Is Your BFF

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I’m a communications major, and in one of my classes, we’ve been talking a lot about how technology is destroying our society. While this information is incredibly depressing, it’s also the truth, and many people are ignorant of it.

A major issue in society is the constant use of smart phones. We are always taking pictures for Instagram or Snapchat, we’re always updating our Facebook statuses, we’re always texting….you get the point; we are attached to our cell phones. And while you may be using your phone to talk to your friends, in reality, it’s like your phone is your friend, not the people you’re texting with.

Think about how much time your eyes spend being glued to your phone. I will fully admit that I am one of the humans of this generation who has an attachment to my iPhone, and I can tell you that sometimes I get distracted because I feel the need to check my messages all the time. This is bad!! It takes you away from reality and essentially into a virtual world.

When you’re out with a friend, and you’re texting a different friend, it’s almost like you’re not really there. Make a pact with your friends to keep your cell phones put away when hanging out, and I bet you’ll feel a whole lot different; you’ll actually be able to give each other your full attention…whoa, what a concept!

If you’re out to dinner with your family and you Instagram your plate of food, or even worse, a selfie with your plate of food, then I just “literally can’t even”. Who gives a crap what your dinner looks like? Who is that going to benefit? Do you feel good posting pretty pictures of your meals? Unless you’re a professional photographer, then gtfo please. Put the phone away and enjoy your food with your family.

Okay, let’s talk more about selfies for a second. Again, I will admit to being a part of this, so I’m not trying to be a hypocrite. But I definitely make sure I don’t overdo the selfies. Some people take selfies EVERYWHERE. Like just stop now please. Again, if you’re with people, and you’re getting distracted by your phone because you want to take the perfect selfie and have to retake it 15 times, then you need to re-prioritize. Instead of focusing on perfecting your selfie, put your phone away and enjoy whatever activity you are doing.

My phone actually sometimes drives me crazy. Sometimes when I’m texting several people at once, I get annoyed and don’t feel like answering anymore, but a part of me feels like I have to or else I come off as a rude person. This is what society has come to. Imagine a time without all this technology…I bet people actually communicated in person 24/7! (So weird, right?!)

Communication is important in our world. It’s a necessary thing in order to connect to one another. Real life connections are crucial because they allow for a more positive environment. Think about the different ways people communicate through text. We think it’s easier to say certain things through text, and while this may be true for certain circumstances, it’s also very false. Take a breakup, for example. Now, do you really think it’s okay to break up with someone through text message? From personal experience, I can say that, no, it’s not okay. This is because text messages don’t allow us to see facial expressions or hear a tone of voice, so we misconstrue things. We might think the person is speaking in an angry tone of voice but, in reality, they could just be trying to send you texts in a calm manner.

Long story short: face to face communication is the best and we have to make sure that we don’t lose that. So try to limit the time you spend on your phone, especially when you are around other people. Let’s turn this society around!

P.S. I just realized that this was totally a blog post of me ranting but that’s okay, I hope you enjoyed it!

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